For years, teen Boggy held the Netflix queue hostage, moving the rest of the family's selections around like chess pieces on a board, or deleting them as heartlessly as toppling pawns. Then he magnanimously created the Boggy Movie Tournament, and a meta game was born. The playing field is finally open. The competition is fierce. You'll never recommend another movie without asking yourself, "But, is it a winner?"

Saturday, July 9, 2011

Round Eleven: One-Sentence Summaries

Posted by Beth

Oy, this was a pretty dreadful round of nominations.

Eden of the East the Movie 1: The King of Eden (Lydia)

One-sentence summary: No consideration whatsoever is given to non-fans to bring them up to date with either the story or the disturbing goal on the part of allegedly sympathetic characters to install a benevolent world dictator.

Gattaca (Eric)

One-sentence summary: The only positive thing about this movie is that we found a new family saying: "I never save anything for the trip back."

Lost in Translation (John)

One-sentence summary: We dutiful viewers are supposed to accept that Bob and Charlotte's last exchange is just between the two of them, but after being forced to endure the droning details of their platonic intimacy for 102 minutes, it's just annoying ("Wha? What did he say? Rewind!").

Percy Jackson and The Olympians: The Lightning Thief (Beth)

One-sentence summary: A pedestrian, plodding, sequential treasure-hunt plot with bad acting, culminating in a trident through the neck.

Kung Fu Panda (Gene)
One-sentence summary: Not the best animated film you've ever seen, but good enough to win this terrible round, and it's sort of hilarious the way the director never acknowledges that Po is adopted.